Sacrificing Present

Mind operates always as a means to an end. It cannot operate in any other way. Its very nature is to work ( in present) towards a projected future. This is not something you have to believe just because it seems logical or just because you can verify it from your past memory. Look at the truth of it inside YOURSELF each day. Its not something far or remote; its as close to you as your breath. Observe your actions. More so, Observe the very impulse in response to which they arise.

Intellectual grasping and understanding are two different things. Its the latter that has to come for any substantial shift. Look for the truth of it inside yourself. You do not need to observe others. You’ll miss the whole point if you do. Just be aware of the machinations you go through. Do not verbalize or explain. If it hurts then let it. Just see. In that seeing understanding comes in. All you have to do is observe it inside. If you can see it there, fine. If you cannot see it there, fine. But do not make another issue out of it.

Mind is always in discontent with the present. Its very mechanism is to seek pleasure. This discontent with the present is posed as a problem; the solution to the problem is projected into the future. The discontent with the present arises as an impulse – often a painful one. Mind , as it cannot stand pain, seeks comfort through projecting a better future. Actions start arising in response to that future reference point. These actions become an escape from the impulse of the present moment. The game begins. The impulse and the superimposed ‘hope’ occur almost simultaneously. We commonly call it as desire. Desire is often treated as something of a positive sorts.

If you can just look honestly inside when you feel a desire. All you will see is a pain. If that pain is sooth-able  through some future solution then the feeling of pain quickly turns into HOPE. If mind is unable to come up with a solution , despair occurs. One feels helpless. Hope is a manifestation of future solution, despair a lack of it. What happens when one feels helpless? When no ‘solution’ is at hand? One seeks an escape through over-indulging in alcohol, eating, sex, T.V , talking etc.

One cannot really bear the pain of the fact that life is uncertain; one can never be certain about anything. Mind seeks comfort in this flux of life through projecting a future and indulging in actions responding to that point ( future). Inability to project a satisfactory point leads one to face the misery one carries. More often than not mind is able to pose a future.

Can you see now how the present is sacrificed at the altar of something that has not even arrived yet? Mind seeks complacency in the thought that it can be certain about future when the truth is that life is as uncertain as uncertainty itself. Its seeks to attain a sense of control through projecting future and acting In accordance to that.

Present is painful to it. To be in present is against its very nature. Present is its death. Present is always posed as a problem and we end up spending our life running after mirages. From one mirage to another with not a single moment of residing in the present. Each act responds to a projected end.

Pain drives us away from present. Or rather our inability to bear the pain drives us into endless mazes. One thinks that one can cleverly maneuver around the pain knowing not that the same pain will come in installments and will lose its power. If you can embrace the pain, which is just a friction between the past-conditioned mind and the present , you realize the ground of present .

Beneath that pain lies the freedom of presence. But we tend to go ricocheting of pain all our life. We treat pain as alien not realizing that this is a doorway to truth, to freedom . To embrace the pain of helplessness , of uncertainty is to transmute it. Suddenly you find yourself with immense energy to deal with ‘what is’. You get fused with an endless source of energy. You realize present. Peace dawns.

To try to be present is again to miss the point. The very trying is for the next moment, hence a mirage. Just bear what is in the moment and you realize the ground. Do not verbalize or explain or conceptualize. Just be one with it. Accept it without a single comforting or non-comforting word or idea. This is true acceptance and it is only such acceptance that can lead to freedom.

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